Low budget culinary indulgence in Maastricht

It’s a regular study day slightly passed noon. My friend and I are strolling out of the university building and into the city. We are chatting but our eyes are keenly darting around. We are on the lookout, deer stalking for something tasty to cram into our grumbling stomachs.

Of course we could go for one of the interchangeable greasy spoons, “frituren” in Dutch. But there are only so many fried cheese pastries, “kaassoufflés” in Dutch, and sad floppy fries I can fish out of a puddle of mayonnaise before the worry about the state of my facial skin kicks in.

Greasy snacks

We pass by a few bars and take-away shops, all advertising the number one Dutch luncheon: “broodjes”. For me this is code for a 30 cm dry and semi stale piece of baguette with some bland tasting Gouda cheese and flavourless ham slapped onto it. Sometimes I wonder whether these places get all the previous day’s leftover bread from Paris shipped in via the Thalys speed train just to be able to brand it with the appealing denomination “broodjes”.

Typical Dutch luncheon: “Broodjes”

Still on the lookout and ready pounce at anything remotely flavourful we notice a few restaurants here and there, that aren’t even open for lunch yet. Oh well, we couldn’t afford them anyway.

Being a student means “low budget” only. But then again, who really feels like paying more than a tenner for a meal and a drink on a regular basis?

Bad news first: the big insider’s tip of most cities, the university cafeteria, disappoints in all aspects. Even though Maastricht has two official university cafeterias, one in the big complex in Randwijck and the other in the inner city Economics and Business faculty, both fall short of expectations.

University cafeteria

Neither one opens for breakfast, which leaves pre-exam or early morning students wanting. The inner city cafeteria even has the strange and unfriendly habit of closing its grill doors on our hungry faces Mondays to Thursdays between 14:00 and 16:30, which coincides with peek appetite times.

Perplexing opening times

On those lucky times when you manage to sneak in you may choose between two hot meals, consisting of the finest compilation of deep frozen and largely unseasoned veggies, cardboard like pieces of meat, and various forms of fried potatoes for a meagre EUR 5-7.
Alternatively there is a salad bar offering an array of bits of lettuce and other vegetables tortured and drowned in oil, for around EUR 3, 50 per portion.
As for the “broodjes” they are so dry that they will leave you with a lot of dry bread crumbs stuck to the inside of your mouth and a scratched palate.

An appetizing meal?

The only upside to the university cafeteria is the coffee corner which despite its listless staff is nearly always open and ready to deal the number one drug to us caffeine addicts.
But be aware that any coffee-beverage with cream literally means an itsy bitsy bit of coffee with a K2 sized heap of whipped cream on top that will make the hot coffee flood over the rims of the cup and onto your hands. It is, however, reasonably priced at EUR 0.90-1.60.

Coffee corner at the university cafeteria

There are two more places to avoid in the inner city. The Wok To Go on the market square introduces itself with all the promises of an Asian take-away: spices, vegetables, meat or fish, and relatively short cooking times that conserve texture and taste of the individual ingredients. To my distress however I quickly found out that ultra short cooking times and thick slices of chicken don’t agree much.

Wok to Go

The second no-go place on the market is Pizzeria Napoli, which I visited for a birthday party. The look and feel of the two-story restaurant was so stereotypical 80’s Italian mobster money laundrette that I expected all along to see a sign proclaiming “original Scarface movie set”. I must have missed it because I was distracted by the waiter’s insistence on addressing me and all the other female diners as “Francesca”. What a way of telling a woman that she is just like any other to him.
While my friends ordered everything pizza and pasta from the menu, I opted for Chef Salad, which turned out to be EUR 9 worth of three badly rinsed leaves of lettuce, three slices of cucumber and pepper, three onion rings, two slices of tomato and five olives, sprinkled with something salty and oily masquerading as vinaigrette. Needless to say this was a non-tipping day.

Pizzeria Napoli

There is no need to worry though! Some tasty bites are not far off.
Around the corner from the dodgy Italian restaurant is Sushi-ya, one of Maastricht’s few sushi outlets. The take-away is tiny and the décor rather uninspired but it’s a treat to enjoy a basic box of sushi and a drink a bit further away on a bench overlooking the romantic bohemian scenery of the river bank. It’s especially nice when you’re sharing this quality time moment with a friend on a spring day. A basic box of sushi costs around EUR 7-9.

Sushi-ya

A surprising treat is the Limburg speciality Zuurvlees, which means sour meat. The Preuverij on Kakeberg 6 serves it in a big bowl with fries on the side for EUR 7, 70. The dish looks rather dodgy, but it really is a hidden gem.
The beef slices are covered with a spicy dark sauce that tastes a little sour at first but with the second bite one discovers a multitude of flavour nuances, such as cloves and bay leaves. Certainly an unusual combination but a must for those brave enough to try it.

Limburg specialty: Zuurvlees or sour meat

Should you actually be craving some fast food, fret not. There are some quality snacks around. For this we return to the very place of my many culinary tortures: the market square. Look out for a caravan stand, which is there almost every day, called Van Leendert. Next to fresh fish it sells different types of deep fried seafood in a doughy crust. I can particularly recommend the mussels and white fish, Kibbeling, with garlic dip, coming in around EUR 3-4 per portion.

Van Leendert Fish

A little Indonesian place called De Klapperboom down Boschstraat is worth a little detour. It has a small number of seats at the back, but mostly sells take-away meals. Meat, fish, or vegetarian dishes in different flavours, and various types of spiced rice can be combined however you like. Only a few dishes have fixed portion prices, the others are priced per hundred grams. A fairly large portion will usually cost between EUR 5-7. One of my new De Klapperboom favourites is fish wrapped in banana leaf.

De Klapperboom Indonesian take-away

And if you still feel like a “broodje” after these low budget culinary escapades, I can recommend a sneak into the cafeteria at the basement of the drama school, Toneelacademie, on Lenculenstraat 31-33. There EUR 1,30-2,30 will buy you a richly packed broodje. Be aware that there is no sign on the door advertising it. Just nib in and take the first flight of stairs down to the left and follow the corridor. It’s not meant for outside visitors, so do try to blend in.

Drama school cafeteria (Toneelacademie)

Bon Appétit, or in Dutch “smakelijk eten”!

Text and photographs by Sina Spohr

Sina Spohr was born in Berlin, Germany. She is currently studying at University College Maastricht and focuses on Psychology.

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